Spider-Man

 

Spider-Man Primer:

United States President Richard Milhouse Nixon: Since the invention of the Spider-Man comic book, each and every United States President has to be Richard Milhouse Nixon, to win a shot at a primary, or particularly the US Presidency.  Who is, Peter Parker?  Well, you need to understand the basic formula of the comics, then the function of each character, and finally, the history period to research for your placements, the people in your “team”, your faulty cabinet, you are considering your operatives; however, they are not your actual campaign team, merely people to move around “at your will”, the power of the Beacon Hill Staff’s Services Chamber (for brunch and whatnot).  Key word ‘whatnot’.  The President, has to say ‘whatnot’.

Formula: Spider-Man, is the US President.  He can be any age or range of stature, but if he has this guide, he just might have a shot.  He is always Richard Milhouse Nixon, a secret ally to the Mossad, to earn the Jewish girl he loved (that was actually a woman with a large butt, and a skinny waist, but she looked like any number of fictional characters, and Spider-Man masturbates chronically, so he has to avoid dominatrixes, they’ll put him in chastity or get him castrated for not having any money, because of another Spider-Man, “Miles Morales”, the Spider Spry, from the old “Fly” comic).  Spider-Man, is a standalone concept, with a leadership team made up of Norman Osborn (a media editor) and his arch-foe, J. Jonah Jameson (a journalist he harasses, into betraying him, over a war he wants to shut down).  Every other character, besides Flash Thompson (who a failing candidate uses, the boobytrap), is a villain.  They work for you somehow on a project, that fails, and whenever it fails, you claim credit for shutting it down.  Those are the faulty cabinet, you don’t know who they are, but it’s up for Harry Osborn, the Wunderkind (a child who thinks he’ll be President, many of them) to report to you on their failure, for your press position.  Naturally, this will end your country, but it’s the only way to be President, and get elected.

The Historical Reference Set: Each Spider-Man character of main appeal, is a reference, to the Death Camps.  This guarantees that MI-6, will be with you, and the IDF, won’t know, that you’re secretly working for them (the Faulty Chambers, beneath the Sudbury Tunnel, into the Water Harbor of the Boston River Delta, for slaves to escape north, to freedom, in Canada). 

Spider-Woman: She picks your major, if you flunk political science, thinking it's a politician.  If you thought political science was a spy, you are now Alastair Smythe, you make this list.

Historical Reference List: This is how your faulty cabinet works, based on historical blame cast, each time there’s a failure, to consider in your press brief.  This is all it takes.

J. Jonah Jameson (Eagle's Nest): Organizational officer (editor).

Spider-Man (Hitler Youth): Character field research.

Venom (Gestapo): Screen writing.

Carnage (Anthropology Research): Technical or scientific writing.

Kraven (Afrika Corps): Artistic censor.

Shriek (The Wives Club): Horror writer.

Rhino (Commandos): Reformed convict writer.

Tombstone (Snipers): Cultural observational writer.

Lizard (Kriegsmarine): Disability rights writer.

Chameleon (Abwehr): Character study writer.

Green Goblin (Labor Ministry): Legal department.

Hobgoblin (Luftwaffe): Flavor writer.

Jackal (Schultzstaffel): Theological writer.

Hydro-Man (U-Boats): Revamp writer.

Dr. Octopus (Vengeance Weapons): Derivative writer.

Electro (Death Camps): Sales pitch.

Vulture (Thul Society): Peripherals expert.

Mysterio (Bodyguard Corps): Penciller or inker.

Kaine Parker (Prisoner of War Camps): Creative property security (Mark of Kaine - The Fergazy).

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